Oh, my mother was frightened by a shotgun, they say;
That's why I'm such a wonderful shot.
I'd be out in the cactus and I'd practice all day,
And now tell me, what have I got?

I'm quick on the trigger,
With targets not much bigger
Than a pinpoint
I'm number one.
But my score with a feller
Is lower than a cellar-
Oh, you can't get a man with a gun.
When I'm with a pistol,
I sparkle like a crystal,
Yes, I shine like the morning sun.
But I lose all my luster
When with a bronco buster-
Oh, you can't get a man with a gun.
With a gu-un, with a gu-un.
No, you can't get a man with a gun.
If I went to battle
With someone's herd of cattle,
You'd have steak when the job was done;
But if I shot the herder,
They'd holler bloody murder,
And you can't get a hug
From a mug with a slug-
Oh, you can't get a man with a gun.

I'm cool, brave, and daring
To see a lion glaring
When I'm out with my Remington;
But a look from a mister
Will raise a fever blister-
Oh, you can't get a man with a gun.
The gals with umbrellers
Are always out with fellers,
In the rain or the blazing sun;
But a man never trifles
With gals who carry rifles-
Oh, you can't get a man with a gun.
With a gu-un, with a gu-un,
No, you can't get a man with a gun.
A man's love is mighty;
He'll even buy a nightie
For a gal that he thinks is fun.
But they won't buy pajamas
For pistol-packin' mamas,
And you can't shoot a male
In the tail like a quail-
Oh, you can't get a man with a gun.

If I shot a rabbit,
Some furrier would grab it
For a coat that would warm someone;
But you can't shoot a lover
And use him for a cover-
Oh, you can't get a man with a gun.
If I shot an eagle,
Although it wasn't legal,
He'd be stuffed when the job was done;
But you can't stuff a feller
And watch him turning yeller-
Oh, you can't get a man with a gun.
With a gu-un, with a gu-un,
No, you can't get a man with a gun.
A Tom Dick, or Harry
Will build a house for Carrie
When the preacher has made them one;
But he can't build you houses
With buckshot in his trousers,
For a man may be hot
But he's not when he's shot-
Oh, you can't get a man with a gun.