Life was so peaceful at the laundry,
Life was so calm and serene,
Life was tres gay
Till that unlucky day
I happened to read that magazine.
Why did I read that advertisement
Where it said,
"Since I rumba, Jim thinks I'm sublime"?
Why oh why
Did I ever try?
I didn't have the talent,
I didn't have the money,
And teacher did not have the time!

Arthur Murray
Taught me dancing
In a hurry;
I had a week to spare.
He showed me the groundwork.
The walk-around work,
And told me to take it from there.
Arthur Murray
Then advised me
Not to worry;
It would come out all right.
To my way of thinkin',
It came out stinkin'-
I don't know my left from my right.
The people around me can all sing
"A-one and a-two and a-three";
But any resemblance to waltzing
Is just coincidental with me.
'Cause Arthur Murray
Taught me dancing
In a hurry,
And so I take a chance.
To me it resembles
The nine-day trembles,
But he guarantees it's a dance.